How to hire a voice-over

Here's what you need to know to hire me as a voice-over:

1. I'll gladly provide you with a free sample, at no obligation to you. I may, however, decide to change the text somewhat, read only a selection of the text or mess with the audio quality. Still, you will get a very good idea of what the final recording will sound like.

2. If you're happy with the demo and my quote, I'll record your assigment. I'll send you a version that sounds terrible, but that does prove I did all the work. Now it's your turn: you can pay me in Bitcoin (we'll work out the rate) or via Paypal in USD or EUR. Then you'll get the high quality file.

3. I'm easy about retakes and fixes. After all, nobody is perfect. If it turns out you left out a sentence or two or if you'd like me to stress a certain word differently, I'll happily fix that. Because I provide the best service, 70% of my customers come back with more business. That's how this became a full-time job for me.

4. I don't bother with repeat-fees, international fees or any other nonsense. My quotes are all-in. I may need your tax registration number for my accounts in order to waive sales tax. I will need this especially if you are EU-based. If you're Dutch, you're paying 21 % sales tax.

5. I may require some up-front payment, because obviously I'm not going to travel the world to collect unpaid invoices. If you're worried I am not a legitimate business, check me out online. You'll find dozens, if not hundreds of samples of my work. It is much easier and safer for me to simply record your text than to risk my reputation by screwing people over. Still, if you really want proof, I can provide references, business registration records, etc.

6. I will help you with your text if you like. I'll point out errors in logic and grammar. If they're minor, I'll simply record the improved version. If you don't like my improvements, I'll just read whatever you send me.

7. Your satisfaction is guaranteed. No cure, no pay. I know of no other professional voice artist who does this.

8. My accent is British and I cannot fake any other English accent. I also speak native Dutch and passable German (Hochdeutsch). My specific English accent is 'RP' (Received Pronunciation or BBC English). Native speakers will be able to detect that I am probably not actually British, but that does not mean they mind. Anyway, these examples speak for themselves. (Well actually no, I speak for my examples, don't I?)

9. My terms and condition for using my work are simply this: you can use the recording for the original purpose without any kind of limitation. If I do your Youtube video and you get a billion hits: good for you, I won't come knocking. But you cannot use the recording for another purpose. For example, if I record a corporate video voice over, you cannot cut a radio advert from it, or even use a clip of it in a different video. Simple and fair, isn't it?

Go on, send me an email. You have nothing to lose and are taking NO risk!